Alternative Ways to Divorce in Connecticut: Litigation, Mediation, and Collaborative Divorce

  •   |   Meghan Freed

After you decide that a divorce is the best decision for you, the next question is often about the available ways to divorce in Connecticut.  The default for Connecticut divorces in Connecticut is litigation. When you talk about litigation, maybe people picture the classic divorce image of two angry spouses battling it out in court. While this still happens, the good news is that it’s not the only route — or even the most common route.  

If you’ve decided to end your marriage, you can also select the divorce method that best reflects your current situation and relationship with your spouse.

The primary options are:

Let’s take a closer look at each one.

Read: Mediation, Collaboration, or Litigation?

Read: Making the Decision to Divorce

Alternative Ways to Divorce in Connecticut: Collaborative Divorce and Mediation

Collaborative Divorce

If you and your spouse agree and/or are willing to work together to resolve important matters like property divisionchild custodyalimony & spousal support, and child support, collaborative divorce could be an ideal option. For example, both of you work with your own attorneys and professionals like those below to negotiate property division and spousal support, develop a parenting plan, and make the divorce easier on your children.

  • Divorce coaches
  • Financial advisors
  • Child specialists

The principal advantage of collaborative divorce is that you decide the terms of your divorce settlement instead of a judge who does not know your family and its dynamics. Because you and your spouse are partners in achieving a mutually acceptable resolution, you don’t see each other as adversaries and can be better co-parents to your children. In addition, the only time you appear in court is when the divorce agreement is signed, so the stress and expense of courtroom involvement are practically nonexistent.

There are a few potential drawbacks to consider. First, with a collaborative divorce, you and your spouse must commit to the process. If you fail to agree in all key areas, making litigation necessary, you must both retain new attorneys and start over with a litigated divorce. 

Read: What Is Collaborative Divorce?

Read: Settlement & Divorce


With divorce mediation, you both work with a trained neutral mediator who helps you agree on all significant aspects of your divorce. While many mediators are attorneys, this is not a requirement. Both you and your spouse still retain and consult with your own attorneys while mediation occurs and before signing the divorce agreement.

Like collaborative divorce, mediation is beneficial in that your co-parenting relationship with your former spouse is likely to be more positive, an outcome that is also beneficial for the children. However, it is also purely voluntary, meaning the mediator’s suggestions bind neither of you.

Although beneficial, mediated divorce does not suit all situations. If you and your spouse cannot communicate civilly or you don’t trust them to disclose all financial information, litigated divorce voluntarily may be the best option.

Read: What Is a Mediated Divorce in Connecticut?

Read: What Is Mediation in Divorce?

Litigated Divorce

Litigated divorce remains the most common, but remember that “litigation” is not necessarily synonymous with “bitter courtroom battle.” You can be in complete agreement in most areas, but if you cannot come to terms with an important factor, such as the amount of alimony or all the details of the parenting plan, the court is there to decide.

Read: What Is a Divorce Trial

Read: What Is an Uncontested Divorce in Connecticut?

Divorce Alternative Next Steps

When you decide to divorce, weigh your options carefully.  To watch our Founding Attorney Meghan Freed‘s full presentation on Choosing Your Approach to Divorce, click here.

At Freed Marcroft, we have helped hundreds of people move forward to a better life and make informed choices about their divorce options.  At our first step, the Goals & Planning Conference, we start by working through these questions with you to help you figure out your goals.  If you decide that divorce is part of what you must do to get you to the future you want, we can help you.  If it isn’t, we will support you and help you figure out what you need to get you there instead.

Let’s keep you moving forward.

Click here so that we can send you a complimentary video where we discuss our first step at Freed Marcroft — the Goals & Planning Conference, why this process exists, plus our insights on how you can get started with us.

Freed Marcroft LLC

Freed Marcroft LLC